


The Freelance Warners

by CarrieWrites, Hamatopurity



Series: The Warners Get Adopted By Gay Ferals; A Tale Of Manic Proportions [1]
Category: Animaniacs, Sam & Max
Genre: Freelance Husbands (Sam & Max), I know I made a fic similar to this, M/M, but Sam and Max are great dads, but this involves my gf’s oc, not too much tho, sam and Max are dating but not married yet that’s for post 305, so warnings for child abuse, some canon divergence here and there, the Warners bio parents suck, who is also her low key self insert, will add more tags as it updates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-15 04:29:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28682577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CarrieWrites/pseuds/CarrieWrites, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hamatopurity/pseuds/Hamatopurity
Summary: The Warner siblings have been alone for as long as they’ve known, until a rabbity thing found them rifling through the trash one fateful day.
Relationships: Dot Warner & Wakko Warner & Yakko Warner, Max/Sam (Sam & Max)
Series: The Warners Get Adopted By Gay Ferals; A Tale Of Manic Proportions [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2102349
Comments: 6
Kudos: 64





	1. Local Chimeras Found In The Trash, More At Eleven

Max walked out of the office, Sam had given him a grocery list while he did some paperwork and listened for the Commissioner to call for a new case.

He was looking them over when-

**_CRASH!!!_ **

The lagomorph swiveled his ear to the sound and turned away from the list to look where the sound came from, seeing the garbage ridden alleyway near Bosco’s Inconvenience.

The shopping list now forgotten, Max followed the noise only to see four chimera children rifling through the trash, they didn’t so much as have clothes on their backs.

The second tallest, presumably the second eldest, lifted his head from the trash can, a banana peel in his mouth he chewed sparingly.

  
  


A few moments ago, Cami and her younger siblings were rummaging through the trash, their fur covered in dirt and trash, tangled and messy.

They’ve been like this for quite some time, having been banned from every single orphanage in New York...they couldn’t get within 20 feet of a single one.

Now they try to get by the best they can, by either stealing, going through trash, or by money strangers give them.

Which is what they were doing at this moment, wincing when Yakko, her younger brother, the second eldest, accidently made a crash with one of the trash cans, eventually waiting for the strange man who seemed paranoid by his own shadow to tell them to scram.

She looks up when she hears footsteps come close, and tenses when it wasn’t the man who came, but what looks to be a rabbit.

Wakko, her youngest brother clings to her at the sight of him, burying his face into her side as she holds onto him, baring her teeth, pressing her ears against her head, letting out a protective growl out.

Max looked between the chimera children and smiled with his usual shark like grin, though this time he hoped it was more comforting than the usual manic grin he wore.

“Kids! Eating garbage too...you could use some clothes, for me it’s a choice, but I take it not quite the same for you.” The lagomorph’s words caught the second eldest and youngest attention to say the least, no one’s ever shown...concern for them before, despite the rabbity thing’s casual tone it was...nice.

The youngest, Dot, finally spoke up “Y-your not gonna yell at us or call us pests?” Max snickered “Well I’d be a real hypocrite if I did!” 

Cami’s expression softens slightly, she still glared at him, but she wasn’t growling or baring her teeth anymore.

Dot was right, it was very VERY rare for someone to actually show concern for them, but Cami has learned the very hard way to not trust anyone who claims to care or show concern about them.

Look where it got them.

So she holds onto her sibs tightly and protectively, narrowing her eyes at the rabbity thing, making it VERY CLEAR she doesn’t trust him or his words.

Max’s smile didn’t waver however, he liked these kids, he was reminded of when he and Sam were kids “Besides, I think you’d prefer food that’s not likely to give you stomach poisoning, it doesn’t bother me but you four probably prefer actual food, I take it.”

The second eldest tilted his head “Are...you offering to help us?” Max replied “I dunno, is tax evasion a federal crime?” The sarcastic but warm reply left the chimera child speechless, looking to Cami whether to accept the lagomorph’s help or not.

Cami glances at Yakko, her expression softening fully as she rubs his head gently, letting out a sigh.

If it had been just her, she’d have run away immediately at the sight of the rabbity thing, but she has her sibs to look after and despite everything screaming at her not to trust this stranger, that he’s going to dump them sooner or later…

They can’t go on like this for long, it’s been a while since they had money to get food, and the last place they were staying at wasn’t safe anymore to sleep at.

A few days indoors with real food could help them for a bit, even if they get dumped again.

So she swallows her pride and smiles gently at Yakko, nodding.

“W-we’ll go with you, um, mister…?” Max chuckled “Just Max, Freelance Police, me and my partner will help ya, illegally if possible! Lots of corn dogs in our freezer with your names on em!”

Max began leading the chimera children out of the alley towards the office building “Mind telling me your names or should I keep calling ya Kids?”

Cami was holding onto her sibs as they followed Max out of the alley, biting her lip, debating if she should answer that…

Wakko quickly answered that question for her-

“W-Well, I’m Wakko…” he gestures to his older brother and baby sister. “That’s Yakko and Dot, and, our big sister’s-”

“Cami-” she says finally, rubbing Wakko’s head, who leans to the touch.

“We’re the Warners.”

Leading them up the stairs Max smiled, trying to make his shark-like grin less frightening “A pleasure, now c’mon, ya could use a bath and some food from the looks of ya.”

Max held the door open for the Warners as they walked in, leading the way to the office.

Sam looks up at the sight of his longtime furry companion, grinning-

And then he notices the four children behind him.

“Holy hip-hopping Halifax with a side of chili fries, Max, you brought kids!”

Cami arches an eyebrow at that, glancing at the dog man warily, holding onto her sibs protectively.

“I found them in Bosco’s trash! They could use some food” Max countered, despite his casual tone, he showed some concern for the chimera children.

Dot looked at the six foot dog wearily “Y-your Sam?” 

“Sure am!” Sam answers who seems to be the youngest, turning to Max. “Found them in Bosco’s trash you say little buddy?”

“Sure did! Think we can make 'em something to dig into, their lookin’ skinnier than a poker player caught cheating'' Max answered, a quick glance showing concern for the four chimera children.

Yakko tilted his head, these two seemed like opposite sides of the spectrum, an odd couple to say the least and yet their already being kinder than anyone else in their lives have been.

It was...nice.

“I’m sure we have some food in the fridge and the freezer we can give them, didn’t we have some corn dogs frozen?” 

Cami glances between Sam and Max, noticing the differences as well, but regardless of it not really trusting them either.

It always starts like this, them being kind and ‘understanding’, and then they show their true colors once she or her sibs start getting comfortable, kicking them out.

Wakko holds onto Cami’s arm, causing her to glance at him and pull him a bit closer to her, rubbing his arm gently and reassuringly.

Whatever, she would protect and look after them once that eventually happens, like she always does.

They have each other, that’s all they really need anyways.

“Yeah we got a couple boxes left, I’ll warm some up, might wanna get them a bath and some clothes while I do that” with that, Max walked out the door to get the corn dogs ready.

Yakko looked at Sam, hesitant before asking “You and Max seem so...different, how do ya know each other?” 

“Well we’ve known each other since we’ve been children, since the third grade! He beat some bully up for stealing my lunch and since then he became a close companion of mine!”

Huh, that’s interesting.

Cami nods at that, glancing around, furrowing her brows at the sight of the goldfish in a water tank.

Certainly...creative.

Dot tilted her head “He really did that for you? After you just met?” It was interesting to think Max didn’t even know Sam and yet he fought someone to help what at the time was a total stranger.

Yakko spoke “And you made this Freelance Police with him?”

“Yup! We always have fun handling the weird cases!” He then glances at their dirty fur and hair. “But we can talk about that more when Max comes back, you four look like you need a bath, no offence.”

“...None taken.” Cami speaks finally. 

“I can lead you to the bathroom if you’d like?”

“...Yeah, that’d be nice. Thank you.” Cami says, motioning her sibs to follow Sam, still keeping them close to her though as they did so.

Yakko held his elder sister’s arm while holding onto the youngest’s hand, following the calm and collected dog man towards the bathroom, sticking close to his siblings.

“Th-thank you Sam...for helping us..”

“No problem kid, just doing what I can.” Sam says, opening the door to the bathroom.

“Now here’s the soap, shampoo and conditioner-” he says, motioning to them. “In here we have some clean towels for you to dry off when you need it, and I’m pretty sure you would like to borrow some of our clothes afterwards.”

Cami nods, giving a small smile.

“That would be nice, thank you Sam.”

He gives a kind smile before leaving.

“If you need anything don’t be shy to ask!”

Cami nods again.

The Warners walk in, closing the door behind them, Yakko walked towards the tub, turning on the hot and cold water, deciding to break the silence as he spoke “Sam and Max are...weird, but in a good way, I like em, I hope they don’t get tired of us too soon…”

Dot nodded “Yeah! Max seems cool and Sam is really nice! I hope they stay like that for a while before they kick us out” 

“Same here! They’re really kind! Hopefully they stay like that for a longer time than the last people we stayed with!” Wakko adds.

Cami sighs, pulling the towels and setting it aside for when they were done taking their baths. 

“I just hope they feed us and give us a warm place to sleep while we stay with them...the last couple we stayed with tended to ‘forget’ to feed us.” she says, tired anger in her voice, hating that they’re used to this kind of thing, but oh well, what can they do?

They have each other, that’s what’s important.

  
Sam had started walking back to the office when he paused, listening to the kids conversation with each other.

His heart sinks for them as the younger ones chatted excitedly about possible staying with them until they eventually kicked them out, like they EXPECTED it to happen.

And then the eldest spoke, all in a tone that was tired and angry, only wanting a place where they can be fed and safely sleep for a while, not really caring about the parts her sibs were excited about.

Like she refused to let herself hope for things like kindness and gentleness from adults.

It was sad...

Yakko sighed “I wish it could be different for once, you ever think...it’s our fault we keep getting kicked out? Maybe we’re just...too much to handle?”

Dot looked down with her floppier ears pressed against the back of her head sadly “Yeah, it seems so nice at first but it’s like...we just ruin people, maybe _we_ are the problem and...not the other way around.”

“...Yeah...we probably are…” Wakko quietly mumbles, and Cami grows angry and furious at their words, hating everything and the world for doing this to them, for making them think THEY’RE the problem when adults, the ones that are SUPPOSED to care, wouldn’t bat an eye if they all died tomorrow.

“Hey, listen to me, all three of you. _WE_ are NOT the problem, okay? It’s not our fault that adults have left us and abandoned us, alright? I mean, we’re just kids, they’re SUPPOSED to care, but they don’t for some screwed up reason, okay? And it sucks, it really, REALLY sucks that we keep being dropped or kicked out...but we have each other, okay? That’s ALL we need.”

She sniffs them and playfully wrinkles her nose. “And a bath, we all stink.”

Wakko lets out a giggle, hugging his eldest sister when she pulls them all for a hug.

Sam crosses his arms before leaving after that, feeling for these children.

Maybe he can talk with Max when he comes back about possibly adopting these kids, illegally if nothing else works.

Yakko climbed into the now full tub with his siblings, he sighed happily, it’s been ages since they had a bath with warm water.

Dot smiled warmly in the water, the last house they were at wouldn’t even let them use warm water, she hoped Sam and Max wouldn’t mind them using up all the hot water.

Wakko blew bubbles in the water, smiling at the warmth, not remembering the last time they ever had a warm bath.

Cami hums happily at the warmth, enjoying it before getting the soap, helping her sibs get clean, cleaning their fur of the dirt and grime of the streets, gently stroking their fur with the soap.

Wakko could feel the months and months of dirt leave his fur and it felt really nice, letting out a purr at the feeling.

Soon the four young chimeras were now clean and completely dirt and grime free, their jet black and off-white fur shined as they stepped out of the tub.

“Man that felt good…” Yakko sighed contently as he grabbed one of the towels and began drying off the fur of his head, causing it to frizz up slightly.

Cami grins, wringing her long hair of any remaining water out in the tub, rubbing her fur dry before patting her hair dry as well. “It did, gods I can’t remember the last time we had a warm bath.”

“Me either!” Wakko says, rubbing himself dry as well.

“I also had forgotten what we looked like without all the dirt and grime, it’s nice to see ourselves again!”

Dot smiled as Yakko went to the door giving a small knock “Um, Mister Sam? We’re done, do you have any clothes we can wear?”

The youngest shook herself off from the remaining water on her sleek black and white fur “If it's not too much trouble, something preferably warm!”

Sam had been going through a few of his clothes (mostly his shirts), and what he can find of Max’s clothes.

“Hold on, I’m getting some for you kids!”

He walks back to the bathroom, opening it enough to hand them the clothes.

“And please, just Sam.”

Yakko nodded “Alright, thank you again.” The second eldest takes the clothes and them around to his siblings.

He raised a brow at the shirt he was given “Is this…a picture of Max on here?” It was mostly black aside from a picture of said lagomorph and his iconic shark-like toothed smile.

“Looks like it.” Wakko says, putting on the shirt he was given.

Cami tilts her head at it, having put on the shirt she was handed...which came to her ankles in a dress-like fashion.

“That’s...odd. Maybe there’s a story behind it?”

Yakko nodded as he pulls the shirt on over his head “I’ll ask about it later, man it’s good to have some fresh clothes again-“

Dot nodded as she pulled on a small red dress with polka dots, their last home didn’t even let them keep the ratty clothing they gave them before tossing them to dirty and dangerous streets.

“Yeah it’s nice!” Cami says before looking to Dot, smiling. 

“Hey, Polka-Dot.” Her usual nickname for her little sister now being obvious with the dress she wore.

Dot gave a small giggle “It is really pretty, wonder where they got it from?” The youngest wondered aloud.

“Dunno, we can ask later, right now though-“ Yakko slipped on the shorts he was given “-Let’s see if those corn dogs are ready yet, it’s been a while since we had real food…” 

“Yeah, let’s go.” Cami murmurs, having braided her hair.

As they walk out the bathroom, Cami keeps her sibs close to her as they walk back to the office when Sam notices them.

“Ah you’re back! Are the clothes okay?”

Yakko nodded “Yes, thank you again! By the way, is this Max on the shirt here?” He couldn’t help but ask.

“And where’d you guys get this pretty dress? It’s so nice!” Dot asked with a small smile, looking at the dress fondly.

Sam laughs, nodding. “Yeah that’s Max alright! Made it myself when we were kids. And that dress was from one of the very few times Max wore clothes. He likes them.”

Cami blinks at that.

“Huh...he has good taste.” she says, Wakko nodding.

“Why thank you!” The lagomorph walked in, a plate full of corn dogs on four plates, one on each hand as well as one balanced on each ear.

“You like dresses?” Dot asked, surprised, most male adults they encountered would always say it was a bad thing for guys to wear dresses..

“You kiddin? Their way more comfortable than any pants I was forced to wear in school besides, they got a _flare_ you just gotta respect” Max replied with a smile as he handed the Warners each a plate of corn dogs. 

Cami smiles kindly as she takes her plate of corn dogs, waiting for her sibs to start eating before she ate as well.

The three younger Warners dug in like starved wolves,Dot almost ate the stick a couple of times before Max caught her “Slow down kiddo! I know it looks appetizing, but probably a big choking hazard for ya!” He could sense the eldest distrust of him so he decided not to intervene physically, only stood close in case the small seven year old needed the Heimlich maneuver. 

“You sure got a lot of these corn dog things, thank you..” Yakko politely said, hoping to be able to be tolerated longer and not be kicked out too quickly.

“Oh corn dogs are my favorite, we got five other boxes of these things!” Max smiled.

“Nice!” Wakko grins, and without a single beat missing-

“Cami stop, you need to eat.”

Cami had attempted to give one of her corn dogs to Wakko, a habit she (and her other sibs) had picked up to prevent Wakko’s ‘munchie attacks’ as he calls them.

“You need it more.”

“I won’t eat if you don’t.”

Cami hesitates before sighing, taking back the corn dog.

Wakko frowns before taking one, and splitting it in half, giving half of it to her.

A compromise.

“We can get you guys more corn dogs if you’re still hungry.” Sam says, noticing the interaction.

“Yeah there’s plenty for everyone, don’t worry about it!” Max added.

“Sorry, it’s just...our brother here has this...condition, where he’s gotta eat more often than most or he gets real sick.” Yakko explained.

A look of sympathy came from the lagomorph “In that case, I’m gonna grab him some more, hey Sam, wanna come with me? I take it these four would like a moment to themselves” the rabbity thing noted from Cami’s expression.

“Yeah, let’s go little buddy.” Sam says, also noting the 16 year old’s protective nature.

They walk out of the office, closing the door.

Sam speaks first;

“Those poor kids had it rough Max, I don’t blame the eldest wariness of us.”

Max nodded “Yeah I figured, finding four kids eating out of the trash without so much as clothes on their backs isn’t exactly comforting…”

He looked up to his partner, a rare expression of concern as opposed to his nigh constant manic grin “Ya heard somethin’ between them, didn’t ya?”

Sam nods, letting out a sigh. 

“It’s bad Max, they’re used to being picked up by people claiming to want to help before something happens that causes them to be abandoned all over again. They’re so used to it, that they’re actually expecting US to abandon them sometime in the future. They’re hoping...the younger ones anyways...that our kindness will last a bit longer than the previous people they’ve stayed at. The eldest...doesn’t hold that hope anymore from what I can tell. She just wants a warm place to sleep and to be fed for a while if there’s a time limit.”

He runs his hand through his face.

“All they have is each other.”

Not much can make Max visibly feel such emotion, but hearing this just about broke his heart, and couldn’t help but be reminded of himself and Sam when they were kids.

“Then they're not too different from us, can’t just leave ‘em alone, that’s for sure.”

If given the chance he’d adopt those kids and fight the government if told not to.

“Are you saying we should adopt them Max? I’m not disagreeing with you if that’s the case but well, do you think they’ll be okay with it? Especially in the case of the eldest? She doesn’t seem to trust anyone outside of her family.”

“Well, yeah. I mean we can’t just abandon them, god knows they’ve had enough of THAT in their lives, I know it might take them time, but we both know they deserve to be happy after everything.” Max replied, sounding rarely more like his age.

He may have only just met those kids, but he can’t deny he cares about them a great deal, even seeing some of himself in them to an extent.

“You’re right little buddy. Hopefully we can get them to trust us, even if it takes some time.” Sam sighs, smiling at his furry companion.

He knows it’s definitely going to take time, but hopefully the kids will eventually trust them.

With a smile and a nod, the lagomorph began walking forward again “That’s right, now c’mon, let’s get those extra corn dogs!”


	2. The Family Grows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s only been a week, and Sam & Max are planning a surprise for the Warners, despite Cami’s growing doubts and anxiousness.

It’s been about a week since Max found the Warners rummaging through the trash and brought them home.

By far it was the longest the chimera children ever stayed at a home, and they couldn’t be happier.

Well, three of them were at ease at least.

Cami was anxious and worried every passing day after the last day they normally would have stayed at a place.

There had to be something they’ve done that annoyed them, that would have caused them to be kicked out in the past.

She didn’t trust it, staying at one place for as long as they did now.

Sure she was grateful that her sibs were eating regularly and had a warm place to sleep for a week but she doesn’t want them to get used to it.

Not when they could possibly get kicked out soon.

She was interrupted from her train of thought by a certain rabbity thing putting a plate of French toast in front of her, the younger Warners already digging into their food, half of it already gone.

“Hope you're hungry, Sam here made a week’s worth extra!” His signature shark-like grin on his face.

“Hey, I couldn’t help it! We’ve got extra mouths to feed now!” Sam defends himself as Cami gives a small, polite smile.

Despite her fear, she still needs to make sure they don’t get kicked out soon.

They’ve been lucky so far, maybe they haven’t noticed any of the things that would have gotten them kicked out.

“Thank you Sam, Max.”

Cami held a suspension about Max when he gave her and her sibs their own guns.

Now she understands that they’re freelance police and they normally don’t follow the laws or rules…

But they’re still CHILDREN WITH GUNS.

Alarms went off at the sight of them but she just decided to convince her sibs that when they kicked them out, they would just return them.

They never needed guns and will continue not to use them.

Max sat down with his own plate, about ready to eat the plate himself “Either way, looking great Sam, and th’ French Toast looks good too” 

He dumped the food down his open mouth, it was a wonder if he even chewed the food before swallowing the whole thing. 

“Not a problem little buddy.” Sam says, then pressing a kiss on top of Max’s head.

Cami pauses from eating another mouthful of food, staring at the affection.

Huh?

“Pardon me for asking but, what exactly are you two to each other?” She asks, genuinely curious.

Max quirked a brow “We’ve been datin’ since high school kid.” He said it as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Kiddo we live together and have known each other since the third grade, what’d you think we were?”

“Well...I just assumed the partner was for the job since you two are freelance police, not for the romantic term. Honestly I...didn’t know you could like the same gender. Everyone who we’ve ever stayed with said you couldn’t. I never questioned it.” Cami admits.

“Well obviously you were with horrible people but that’s just them being homophobic.” Sam says.

Yakko looked wide eyed “You can really do that?” Dot added “We didn’t know that was...legal, or something you could do”

Max gave a laugh “HA! Even if it wasn’t allowed, it sure wouldn’t stop us, came out of the closet once and I’m sure as hell not going back in anytime soon” 

“Neither am I! We’ve come too far just to go back.” Sam agrees.

“...Huh…” Cami murmurs, continuing to eat.

“That’s nice to know!” Wakko says, finishing his plate.

Yakko and Dot finished up their plates as Max got out from his chair, handing Sam his now empty plate.

The second eldest perked up his ears “Going somewhere Max?”

“Yeah got some uh, errands t’ do” Dot raised a brow “You guys go on errands?”

“Once in a blue moon!”

“See you in a bit, little buddy!” Sam grins as Max leaves.

“So, how did you and Max get together? We know how you two met but-“ Cami asks.

“Oh, it was during a prom night at high school.”

“Oooh, really?” Wakko says, eyes widening.

“Yeah!”

“How’d it happen?” Dot nodded “Yeah, tell us!” The younger Warners looked at Sam expectantly, their interest peaked.

“Did you dance or kiss?” Yakko couldn’t help but ask, Dot giving her best puppy dog eyes to hear more.

Sam laughs nervously, rubbing his head.

“Well, it’s a bit more complicated than that, you see, Max had written this whole letter for me confessing how he felt towards me, and things kept happening that delayed him giving it to me, like me dancing with this one girl up until that point I had a small crush on. Max ran into this bully who got his hands on the letter, and basically outed him to the entire school.”

Cami’s expression dropped, horrified.

“Oh that’s horrible!”

Even if she wasn’t aware of the fact you can date the same gender, she knows it’s never okay to basically out someone’s crush to basically everyone who hears of it. 

They were at the edge of their seats, Yakko tilted his head “What happened then? Did ya do something?”

“If it were me I would’ve given that jerk a piece of my mind for doing that!” Dot exclaimed.

“Well I punched the jerk of course! Max was obviously upset after that happened and tried running away to avoid talking to me but I just chased after him.”

“Serves that jerk right, that letter was very personal.” Yakko nodded as he listened closely.

“I don’t blame Max for being upset after all that…” Dot muttered.

“Me either…” Wakko agrees.

“So what happened?” Cami asks, tilting her head.

“Well, I followed him outside, he climbed up a tree in an attempt to get away from me but I just sat near it. After a while we talked about it, and feelings got shared and I also confessed to him.”

“Aw…” Wakko says, Cami smiling at that.

Yakko beamed “And you two have been together ever since?”

Dot giggled “That’s so sweet! I’m surprised you two aren’t married yet, aren’t you two like...forty?” 

“Well, we’ve been holding it cause with all the cases, and I’m just waiting for the right moment to pop the question.” Sam says.

“That’s so sweet.” Cami smiles.

Yakko nodded in agreement as Dot smiled “Maybe we could even help!”

The children excitedly clamored at the possibility of helping Sam propose in the future.

_One hour later…_

Max had stored the items he received from his ‘errands’ into his inventory as he opened the door to the building and began his way to the office, he and Sam have been planning this for days, he only hoped it went well.

He sent a message on his phone to tell Sam he was just coming up the stairs

‘ _Hey Sam, I got everything, how are the kids doing?’_

Sam pulls out his phone as the Warners talked amongst each other, admiring how they seemed in their own personal bubble when conversing with each other.

_‘The kids are doing great! Any trouble with getting the stuff?’_

_‘Besides the hobo on Main Street trying unsuccessfully to take the cake, gone without a hitch!’_

Max smiled to himself remembering the look on the poor bastard’s face when he pulled out his gun as a warning.

Sam gave a chuckle.

_‘You crack me up little buddy’_

He puts away his phone, getting up to get the presents he got for the kids.

Cami’s ear flicks to him, furrowing her brows.

Max stowed away his phone wherever he puts his inventory as he opened the door to the office, his signature unnerving grin bright as usual.

Yakko smiled as the youngest, who fell asleep earlier, perked her ears up “Oh hey Max!”

“Heya scamps, got a little surprise for ya but first-“ from somewhere he pulled out the large decorative cake “Who wants CAKE?” 

Wakko’s eyes went wide, grinning. “OOOOH WE CAN REALLY HAVE SOME?!”

Cami’s eyes went wide as well, covering her mouth.

She doesn’t remember the last time they ever had something to genuinely enjoy…

She doesn’t even know if they EVER got to ENJOY food before this.

“Well yeah! I bought this for you kids, so dig in, you get as many slices and as big pieces as ya want!” Max cheerfully replied, placing the plate on the desk that still had one of his souvenir knives in it.

“I’m gonna go get Sam, you kids can start eating, I’ll be quick.”

The lagomorph went towards his and Sam’s room.

Sam was grabbing the clothes he made for the kiddos, turning to see Max.

“Hey Max, the kids eating the cake?”

“Sure are, how’s their presents lookin?” Max smiled wide, looking at the clothes wrapped in colored paper and shiny bows.

“Looking great! Hopefully they’ll like it!” Sam says, smiling hopefully.

“I’m sure they will ya doof, now c’mon, before they eat all the cake” the lagomorph chuckled as he began walking back towards the office, Sam close behind now.

Cami was eating her second slice of cake as her siblings excitedly chatter when Sam and Max return, glancing at them nervously with everything that’s been happening today.

They’ve been weirdly kinder than usual, she wasn’t sure what to make of it.

Max smiled “Enjoying yourselves already I take it?” Yakko nodded as he licked some icing from his lips “So what’s this surprise you mentioned?”

The lagomorph chuckles “Alright, well it’s been a long time coming, me and Sam actually thought this through a lot but-“ from wherever he keeps his inventory, Max pulled out four papers.

He set them on Sam’s desk for the Warners to see.

Their official adoption papers.

Cami froze at the sight of them, her ears pressed against her head, eyes widening.

She couldn’t talk or move, she was shocked into stillness.

“Y-You adopted us?” Wakko asks, glancing at the two.

“Well yeah! You were already great kids when we met you four, but the longer you were here, the more we wanted to make it official, and well, here we are!” Max smiled wide.

Yakko as well as his siblings looked at the dog and lagomorph wide eyed “Y-you really want us?” Dot held her tail nervously “We’re usually ‘too much’ for most people to handle…”

“Well not this time, you kids are great, and not nearly as much ‘too much’ as our usual brand of pure insanity.” Max reassured.

“Yeah, you kids are a joy to be around.” Sam smiles.

Cami still didn’t speak, still staring at the papers with wide eyes, her heart hammering in her ears.

She couldn’t believe it, she REFUSED to.

They never were wanted, always were written off as nuisances, they only ever needed each other, they-

“Oh, also, I got you four something.” Sam speaks up, remembering the gifs in his hands, handing the kiddos their gifts each, snapping Cami out of it momentarily.

She takes hers, shakily opening hers to reveal clean, clothes that looked to be in HER size.

Wakko lifts the ball cap from his, smiling shakily as he plops it on his head.

Yakko lifted his, seeing a rather dapper suit and fedora just his size, Dot had joyful tears in her eyes seeing a blue, polka dot dress and a flower scrunchie to hold up her ears.

“We figured you’d like something to wear that’s not one of our hand-me downs” Max voiced with a bit more gentle smile than his usual manic grin.

“Th-thank you…” Yakko sniffled with tears of his own forming, hardly believing anyone would really, truly want them around.

Cami gently held the flannel in hers, stroking it…

As heavy tears run down her cheeks, taking in a shaky breath and-

“You really aren’t messing with us? You really want us?” she croaks, for the first time in her life being openly vulnerable.

“We really do, kiddo.” Sam reassures her.

And that did it for Cami.

She lets out a heavy sob, covering her mouth, trembling and shaking as tears run heavily down her cheeks.

Max walked up to her, placing a gentle hand on her arm, he wasn’t great at emotions at the best of times, but he was going to try.

“We were waiting to tell ya just right, didn’t want to just spring it on ya, hope ya like it here with us.”

Cami glances at the lagomorph, giving a genuine, trembling smile.

“Thank you…”

“C-Can I call you Dadoo? Will that be alright?” Wakko asks.

Max turned to Wakko, who had tugged on one of his ears, he smiled “Sure thing kid, call me whatever you're comfortable with.”

Yakko and Dot were quick to hug the lagomorph tightly, Dot nuzzling his side “Th-thank you...thank you so much…”

Max was close to toppling over but he didn’t care, with his free hand, he gave the younger Warners a maternal pat on their heads with as warm and comforting a smile as he could manage.

“Don’t mention it lil’ scamps.”

Wakko joins in the hug and Cami can’t help but also come with him, letting out a shaky laugh when Sam pulls them ALL for a big hug.

The family smiled, content and happy to be together, now for good.


	3. Fears In The Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dot wakes up from a nasty nightmare, thankfully, Max wasn’t really sleeping anyway.

Dot shoots up from the inflatable bed she was sleeping in with a quieted yelp, covering her mouth as she shook.

She immediately looked at each side of her, to her right are her brothers and her left is Cami, all sleeping soundly in inflatable beds of their own.

Normally Cami or Yakko would help her calm down after a nightmare but Dot doesn’t want to bother them from a good night sleep, so she gets up, quietly sneaking out the room and to the kitchen, opening a cupboard to get a cup to drink water.

From the top bunk of Sam and Max’s room, a large, furry white ear raised upwards before a certain lagomorph raised his head up groggily.

He heard small footsteps from outside the room, he looked at Sam from the bottom bunk, seeing him still out like a light, kicking his leg in his sleep occasionally; Max quietly began climbing down using the grappling hook rope to shimmy down.

The rabbity thing walked on his tiptoes as not to disturb his partner or the chimera up in the night.

Dot had filled the cup with water, taking sips of it to calm herself, but it wasn’t really helping all that much.

Her heart hammered loudly in her ears and her chest, and she tried to keep herself grounded by drinking more water, but it didn’t really help, she didn’t even notice the lagomorph walking into the kitchen.

Max slowly reached a hand to her shoulder, carefully tapping her to hopefully pull her out of what would’ve no doubt become a panic attack.

“Hey, kiddo-”

Dot flinched, turning to see Max, letting out a breath.

“O-Oh! Hey, Papa...d-did I wake you?” 

Guilt settled in her, like it would every time Cami had to protect her or Yakko had to reassure her she did nothing wrong even though it got them kicked out in the past.

The lagomorph only smiled as kindly as he could manage “Nah, I don’t get much sleep most days anyway, don’t worry about it Pumpkin.” 

He looked at the cup of water that got a bit spilled during her silent panic “Bad dream, huh?”

Dot hesitates before nodding. “I...I didn’t want to bother my sibs about it, they’ve always needed to worry about me before, they don’t need to reassure me about a silly nightmare.”

Though it absolutely TERRIFIED her, she knows that it’d never happen.

Yakko and Cami PROMISED it would NEVER happen, and they’ve NEVER broken it.

Max knelt down to be more at her eye level “Wanna talk about it? Don’t worry about keeping me up, I don’t really sleep that much anyway.”

Dot hesitantly nods, glancing at her cup.

“W-Well, I was back out on the streets, like we normally would be by now...but I was  _ alone _ ...I had to do everything alone and I was scared and cold and-”

She sniffles, now noticing the tears running down her cheeks.

“Cami and Yakko PROMISED that we would never be separated or abandon each other, but I’m scared that one day they’ll break it even though they’ve NEVER broken a promise to me or Wakko before...they’ve never left us behind when they could. Cami always says we’re a pack, we’re either all going or not at all. She’s never broken it, none of us has...and...and  _ yet- _ ”

She lets out a sob, wiping her tears as more and more run down.

A comforting arm was quickly wrapped around her form while Max’s free hand wiped away her tears “Hey, it’s okay, that’s never gonna happen, alright? They're still here and me and Sam aren’t gonna let that happen, I’ll be nuked to the great beyond before I let that happen, okay?”

The lagomorph carefully picked her up “C’mon ya need to sit down, your shaking more than Sam at a clown convention.” 

Dot lets out a shaky laugh at that. “Funny, Wakko’s also terrified of clowns.”

She nuzzles into Max, calming a bit.

Max chuckled “Guess that’s somethin’ they’d have in common” he sat down on one of the kitchen tables with Dot on his lap.

“Wanna know something? I got a uh, a bit of a fear of ventriloquist dummies” Max voiced, hoping sharing his own phobia would help ease Dot’s own fears.

Dot blinks at that. “Those creepy dolls that can talk?”

The lagomorph nodded “Ever since I was a little kit, I think it started at my fifth birthday, some ventriloquist act, but the creepy thing’s head popped off during the performance, haven’t been able to stand the damned things since!”

Dot shudders at that, but she lets out a giggle. “I wouldn’t either! They’re already creepy on their own!”

Her shaking was dying down bit by bit.

Max smiled, ruffling her hair a bit “Your telling me! Those things are creepy and disgusting! I’d like to bite the hand off of the ass that invented those damn things”

“It probably sounds silly to be scared of em, but hey, what ya gonna do?” The lagomorph said with some humor in his voice.

Dot giggles before letting out a yawn, rubbing her eyes tiredly.

Now that she’s calmed down from the nightmare, she started growing tired again, starting to nod back to sleep.

Max smiled, taking the cup out from her hands, setting it aside “Getting sleepy? Want me to take ya back to your room, Pumpkin?” 

The rabbity thing gently brushed some of her hair from her eyes.

Dot hesitates before-

“C-Can I sleep with you, Papa? Is that okay?” 

Max looked surprised at first before his usual, iconic, manic grin was back on his face “Sure thing Pumpkin, hope ya don’t mind Sam’s snoring.”

Carrying her gently, Max made his way back to his and Sam’s room, carefully he hopped up to his bunk with Dot in his arms.

He lifted up the covers as he laid Dot gently next to him before covering both himself and the small chimera child up in the warm blanket.

Dot curls into him, nuzzling herself into his chest, letting out another, quiet yawn.

Max smiled “G’night Pumpkin.”

With that, he found himself passing out soon after, a content smile on his face as he closed his eyes.

Dot falls asleep not long after he does, nightmare forgotten and none followed afterwards, leaving her a very peaceful sleep.

  
  



	4. Gun Safety And How To Reassure Your Chimera Son

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Giving children guns is one thing, teaching them how to properly use them is another thing.

It was about time the Warners got some lessons on gun safety, to say the least.

Max was for gratuitous violence as much as the next psychotic, but he’d rather his kids not get hurt in the process.

He was knelt down to Dot’s side helping her aim “Alright now lean in a bit, the recoil is a real doozy, take a deep breath, and…”

**_BANG!!!_ **

“Thata girl! Great job!” He ruffled her hair and ears with a chuckle, he looked to the second youngest “Wakko your t-“

He stopped, noticing the uncomfortable look on the youngest Warner brother.

Sam had been talking to Cami (she was hesitant about using the guns), reassuring her that she didn’t HAVE to use it, it was more of teaching them on how to use them properly if the need arises when he noticed Max’s pause.

He turns to notice Wakko’s discomfort.

“Hey kiddo, something the matter?” 

The chimera pulled at his ears and hat distressfully, a small whimper escaping him “Th-the noise…”

Max gave a sympathetic look, a small stab of guilt rush to him for not realizing Wakko’s discomfort sooner.

Sam frowns before getting an idea-

“Hey, how about I teach you by yourself bud? Away from all the noise?”

Wakko gave a hesitant nod, gripping onto Sam’s large arm for comfort.

Max gave a reassuring (well he hoped it looked reassuring anyway) smile “Don’t worry about it, kid, just do what you're comfortable with, okay?”

The youngest Warner brother gave a small nod “O-okay…”

Sam gently pats Wakko’s shoulder as they walk to a more quiet area, giving a reassuring smile.

“It’s alright to get jumpy at the loud noises bud, guns are pretty loud.”

Wakko shuddered slightly “L-loud noises are always louder for me than others...I dunno why, they're just noises I don’t...know why, they almost hurt sometimes…”

He held Sam’s arm a little tighter to secure himself a bit more.

“That’s alright, we just need to work with what makes you comfortable. We probably may need to get you some shooting ear muffs to help with that in the future.”

Wakko leaned against Sam “Th-thank you…” before he remembers not receiving the same kindness from the other homes he and his siblings had stayed at…

...or by their parents…

“No problem kiddo.” Sam smiles, rubbing the chimera’s shoulder.

They stopped at a secluded area where it was quiet.

“Do you think this will work?”

Wakko looked around, smiling slightly “Yeah, I-I think so, it looks kinda nice too!”

Wakko held out his gun, each of their guns were personalized, Wakko's had a carving and ink of a sharp toothed and wide eyed face at the front of the barrel and a couple Don Knotts stickers on the handle of the gun.

“S-so how do we start?”

“First we put in the silencer to help with your sensitivity to sounds.” Sam says, placing it on the gun, showing Wakko how to do it.

“And then, here’s how you remove the safety-“

Wakko carefully did as Sam told him, his hands shaking slightly from nervousness-

**_BANG!!!_ **

“Eep!” Wakko accidentally shot the gun at a decaying tree with his fumbling.

“Whoa, easy there champ! It’s alright!” Sam chuckles, placing a hand on Wakko’s shoulder, hopefully grounding him.

“Sorry! I-I’m sorry! I-I didn’t mean to I-” Wakko whimpered fearing the mistake would make the Irish Silverhound upset or angry.

The chimera held onto himself to try and avoid a panic attack.

“It’s alright, it’s alright, you want to take a break?” Sam asks, noticing the young chimera’s growing panic.

With a gulp, Wakko nodded “S-s’rry I-I-I’m jus’ nervous, a-and I-I don’t wanna mess up…” the chimera held his tail nervously.

He hated feeling so dumb and pathetic, especially in front of one his fathers.

“It’s alright, you aren’t going to get it immediately. It definitely took me a while before I was able to properly use a gun. Now let’s put the safety back on-“ Sam reassured him, going to show him how to put the safety back on. 

Wakko nervously nodded as he did as Sam showed him, his hands much less shaky this time, careful not to accidentally shoot the gun again.

“There we go, are you alright? That looked like it gave you a scare.” Sam says, looking worriedly at the young chimera.

He knows these kids aren’t probably going to get it immediately, but Wakko was shaking like a leaf, as if he feared messing up.

“I-I’m trying not t’ mess up, I’m sorry…” Wakko had his ears pressed against the back of his head.

“Back at the orphanages and the other homes we stayed at...it was like I was messin’ up more no matter what I did, a lotta them said I was...dumb and a big screw up…” Wakko explained, avoiding his father’s gaze.

Sam kneels down to Wakko’s height.

“Wakko, trust me when I say that you aren’t dumb, and you aren’t a screw up, alright? For certain people it takes time to get things and that’s perfectly okay! You’ll get them in time, you just gotta be patient. But you aren’t a screwup, okay?”

The small chimera looked at Sam surprised before tackling him with a hug, his arms wrapped tightly around his neck as he let some tears flow from his cheeks.

“Th-thank you Dad...thank you…” his voice shuddered slightly, thankful to hear reassurance from someone other than his sibs, he wouldn’t say it, but he felt they really only said he wasn’t dumb so not to hurt his feelings.

Sam hugs Wakko back, smiling as he squeezed the young chimera gently. “No problem kiddo.”

Wakko nuzzled into Sam’s neck with a bright smile.

They stayed like that for a while until Wakko eventually let go with a sniffle, wiping his left over tears with his sleeve.

“ ‘M okay now, we can go back to th’ guns stuff now, I’m alright now, thanks Dad.” 

“Alright, now you remember how to take off the safety, or do you want me to guide you through it again?” Sam asks.

Wakko shook his head “Nah, I got it this time!” He demonstrated this by taking the safety off.

Looking up to his father, he smiled “What next?”

“Alright, you see the decaying tree? Aim towards it, take a deep breath and shoot.” Sam gently instructs.

Wakko nodded, aiming the gun carefully at the decaying tree, closing one eye to aim better, he took a deep breath, fingers pressed at the trigger and then-

**_BANG!!!_ **

The bullet went straight through the rotting tree, bringing a large smile to the young chimera’s face “I did it! Did ya see?! I did it!” 

“Great job kiddo! You did great!” Sam grins, scratching his ears gently.

Wakko gave a hearty giggle at the affectionate action, a large smile on his face as he let his tongue playfully roll out.

“Thanks dad, for teaching me and...talking with me, it was really nice.” The chimera smiled up at his father.

“Of course bud, anytime you need to talk, I’ll be here for you.” Sam smiles.

The ten year old jumped up to hug Sam, giving the tall dog man a gentle nuzzle with his cheek.

“I love ya dad…” 

Sam hugs him back, smiling big.

“Love you too, bud.”

Wakko couldn’t be happier, he and his finally with a family that loved them.

It was perfect.


	5. Sorry both our birth parents sucked but it’s better now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yakko is found on the roof alone, thankfully Max is there and can listen, and share his own unlucky experiences.

Careful, flat footed paws cautiously made their way up the steps until finding themselves to the roof.

Just sitting on the edge of the roof of the large building was the eldest Warner brother, still in his PJs, not seeming to notice the lagomorph.

With a sigh, Max walked to his son, silently sitting next to him.

“So what’s eatin’ ya kiddo?”

Yakko startled, turning to see one of his dads.

“O-Oh, hey Pops...just…”

Yakko sighs, glancing forward, bringing his knees to his chest.

“Just a bad dream…”

Though his shark-like grin remained, the rabbity thing’s eyes showed a level of concern “From my experience, it’s never ‘just’ a bad dream, you can tell me, I won’t tell Sam or your sibs, I promise.”

Max’s voice had a gentle kindness rare for his usual cadence.

Yakko hesitates before-

“It was of our parents...our biological ones...they weren't the best, made Cami work weird jobs and she doesn’t like talking about it, it probably gives her bad memories. And since we were...younger, we did chores around the house...and if we...we messed up on something…they…they...”

He holds himself tight, shaking slightly.

The lagomorph was quick to wrap a comforting arm around the chimera “Hey, hey, it’s alright, take a deep breath, Yakko, it’s alright.”

Max felt a deep dread in his stomach, his folks were hurtful to a...different degree, but he couldn’t help but be reminded of his own living situation growing up.

Yakko leans into Max, taking a moment to calm before-

“With our parents not, really being the best and with Cami being forced to work jobs and barely being able to see us, I had to help take care of Wakko and Dot myself, and protect them when Cami couldn’t…”

He takes a shaky breath in.

“It was hard…”

Max rested his chin on Yakko’s head in a gentle form of comfort “I bet it was, kiddo, I’m sorry...how’d you end up gettin’ away from them? Ya don’t gotta tell me if ya don’t wanna kiddo.”

The lagomorph gave gentle rubs to Yakko’s shoulder as he spoke, he’d be the first to admit he wasn’t what you would call in tune with his emotions, but right now, for Yakko, he was gonna try.

The young chimera holds himself a bit tighter as-

“...One day they woke us all up at night, telling us we were leaving. At the time we didn’t question it...questioning things would lead to more bad stuff so we just went with them to the car…it didn’t take long for us to notice we were heading right towards the Hudson, and before we knew it…they had jumped out of the car and we-“

He chokes on a sob, remembering the fear and terror in those moments.

The lagomorph’s eyes went wide as his usual nigh permanent grin faded, a rarity for Max, replaced with a shocked frown.

He suppressed the urge to growl, not wanting to frighten Yakko than he already was, taking a mental note to track those assholes down and give them a piece of his mind. Or the receiving end of his gun barrel, whichever came first.

“Hey, it’s alright now kiddo, they can’t hurt ya anymore, not if me and Sam got anything to say about it, you're as safe as a gold brick in Fort Knox with us, I promise on my Great-Grandpa Maximus’ grave.” His voice was full of as much confidence and truth as he could put into the words.

Looking back to when he met the Warners, he can’t help but understand why Cami distrusted adults so much if this was how their birth parents were like.

Yakko sniffles, wiping his tears.

“I don’t remember how Cami got us out of the car, but she told us we weren’t going back and we just walked and walked till the orphanage found us...and from then on we bounced from home to home, eventually staying in the streets till you found us…”

He lets out a shaky breath.

“We only really had each other till then…”

Max held onto Yakko, rubbing comforting circles around his arm and back “Don’t worry kiddo, ya won’t have to worry about those  **[CENSORED]** holes ever again.”

He’d make sure of it or die trying.

The lagomorph carefully wiped away Yakko’s tears with a uncharacteristically gentle “As long as me and Sam are here, we won’t let anything like that happen again, it’s a promise.” He gave a more small and gentle smile to Yakko.

Yakko gives a trembling smile as more tears roll down his cheeks.

“T-Thanks Pops…”

It felt so relieving to have someone who wasn’t Cami take care of them, because as much as he adores his big sister, he knows it had to be tiring looking after them when they barely had anything for themselves.

Now they can all be looked after and they can finally BREATHE.

He was so grateful for it.

Max brushed some hair from Yakko’s eyes “Anytime kiddo, if ya ever have another nightmare like this, or just wanna talk, just come to me or Sam, I barely sleep anyway.”

The lagomorph smiled, a comforting tone in his voice as he spoke.

Yakko nods, sniffling before nuzzling into Max’s side, giving a smile.

“Okay Pops…”

“Now, ya rather stay up and watch the city lights of ya getting tired yet? We can stay up ‘til the suns up if ya want kiddo” Max asked, looking at Yakko with a smile.

“I got too much of a permanent sugar rush to go to bed anytime soon, so either way, I’m not opposed.”

“...I’d like to stay up here for a little bit, if that’s okay? The lights are really pretty…” Yakko says, looking out to the city.

Max smiled as he ruffled Yakko’s hair “Fine by me, the city is pretty nice at night, ya almost forget the sleazy crime and horrible smog in the air!” 

Despite the ironic pessimism in his words, he was right, the lights that could be seen as far as Queens were bright and shiny, like dozens of stars.

Yakko giggles at that, nodding.

“Yeah, you kinda do!”

Sharing a laugh of his own, the two sat there for a while, it could’ve been ten minutes or an hour before Max spoke again.

“Y’know...my folks weren’t...really the best either, they weren’t nearly as bad as yours, I’m not gonna pretend I had it worse or anything, they didn’t hit me or try an’ kill me or anything, but...they were never there for me or...really any of my siblings, and most of my sibs well...they aren’t like you and your sibs kiddo, as a kid I really only had Sam... and back then I-I didn’t see anything wrong with it cause…”

He sighed heavily.

“They were like  _ me. _ ”

Yakko frowns before hugging the lagomorph, nuzzling his side in an attempt to comfort his dad.

Max looked surprised before returning the hug with a small smile “Thanks kiddo, for-for a while, I thought I was well, no better than them...but around Sam, well, I can like myself a little more, he makes me feel like, I’m not just as bad as them, still probably pretty bad but, I feel a little better around Sam.” 

Yakko smiles at that.

“That’s really great Pops.”

He liked hearing about his dads’ story, from when they were kids to now.

Max smiled to himself “Honestly, I dunno what’d I do without Sam, my ol’ family may not be great but...I got somethin’ better now.” 

He looked to Yakko, ruffling his fur and hair “I got Sam, and I got you kids, that along with fulfilling justice through needless violence, I dunno what else I could ever need.” 

Yakko leans to the affection, giving a gentle purr at it, smiling at Max.

Max smiled his usual Cheshire smile, patting his head as he looked to the sky, the sun slowly beginning to rise as he let his ears droop into a sort of hug to Yakko’s head.

Life was good.


	6. It’s Okay To Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cami can’t sleep or rather hasn’t let herself sleep in some time, hopefully Sam is here to lend an ear

The Warner Siblings were all out with Max, hanging out with him for the day.

Well...all but one Warner.

Cami had almost fallen asleep when eating breakfast, so she ended up going back to her bed after she ate, falling back asleep.

She says she has trouble sleeping, but she won’t admit that she can’t sleep some nights.

She won’t admit some nights she ends up staying awake worrying about her sibs.

She always has and them being adopted doesn’t change that, if anything, it just worsens the worry for her sibs.

Cause they already seem so attached to Sam and Max, something she won’t let herself do.

All adults have hurt and disappointed them, it’s only a matter of time before they do the same to her and her sibs…

And she’ll have to pick up their broken pieces all over again.

But for now she lets herself nap, cause she doesn’t want to worry her sibs more than they probably were.

Sam felt worried, peering through the doorway, seeing Cami still fast asleep, he knew she was trying to hide it, but she wasn’t sleeping most nights, he could guess why, he and Max were untrained police but police nonetheless and could sense someone hiding something.

Sam made to move a little close but froze when the floor squeaked quite loudly.

Slowly, he looked to see if he’d accidentally woke up his eldest daughter.

Cami’s ear flicks up at the noise, groaning quietly, looking up to see Sam, who to his credit, looked like he didn’t mean to wake her.

“...Sam?”

The Irish Greyhound gave an apologetic smile “Sorry kiddo, didn’t mean to wake ya, jus’ wanted to make sure you were alright.”

Giving a sympathetic and gentle smile asked “How are you feeling? I can leave you alone if your still feelin’ tired.”

Cami rubs her eyes, yawning. “No it’s alright, I’m awake now. ‘Sides, if I end up sleeping the entire day it will ruin me sleeping at night.”

The six foot dog man gave a small chuckle “Haha, good point, Max and your siblings are still out shopping.”

Sam pointed towards the kitchen with his thumb “Wanna help me whip up some lunch for when they're back?”

Cami smiles, getting up and walking towards the Irish Greyhound.

“Sure! What are we making?”

Walking towards the kitchen, Sam replied “Deciding between grilled cheese and some burgers, what d’ya think?”

He looked to the eldest Warner “Unless you got a better idea?”

“Hmm, burgers sound really good!” Cami says, humming at the thought.

“Burgers it is then!” Sam cheerfully replied, getting to the kitchen, began pulling out the proper utensils and pans.

As he got the burgers out from the freezer, he asked “So I take it you haven’t been sleeping well? Y’know Max has the same problem.”

Cami holds herself tight, frowning.

“...It’s nothing really...I’ve always skipped nights of sleep just to make sure my sibs were okay…”

It's a habit for her, to make sure her sibs are sleeping soundly and safely, even if she misses a good few hours of sleep.

Sam gave a worried glance “I can understand that, but you need plenty of sleep too, you’ll end up passing out during the day otherwise.”

He knew Cami was still getting used to being apart of a family that wouldn’t abandon them, it’s only been two weeks now, but still, he worried hearing she wasn’t at enough ease to so much as let herself sleep without worrying about her siblings.

“I know...I’m working on it…”

Not exactly a lie, but she can’t let herself get too comfortable here, she doesn’t trust it, even if it has been two weeks…

She can’t risk something happening that may ruin everything and getting them actually kicked out.

She needs to be prepared.

“Hey…” he placed a gentle hand on her shoulder “It’s okay, me and Max won’t let anything bad happen to you or your siblings, I…” he gave a heavy sigh.

“I know you...have a hard time trusting Max and me.” He began “But I want you to know, we’re not gonna abandon you, we love you kids, you...you actually remind me of me and Max when we were kids in all honesty.”

That got her attention, looking at the Irish Greyhound in surprise.

“Really? How so?”

She has to admit, hearing about Sam and Max’s childhood was always interesting, so hearing that she reminded him of them as children did shock her.

“Well, we only really had each other, and to us, that’s all we needed, don’t let Max know I told you this, but his family weren’t exactly the best, after we met he spent more time at my house than his own, no one at school really liked either of us, there’s a reason I met Max when some jerk was stealing my lunch, and sure Max got hit on by girls but those girls just wanted to go out with him ‘cause he was mean to ‘em and they never got the hint that Max liked guys, all me and Max needed was each other…”

He smiled looking at Cami “Kinda like you four, you stick together closer than sap to a tree, before Max found ya, all you needed was each other and just wanted to always stick together, right?” 

Cami takes a second before nodding.

“Yeah...yeah all we really needed was each other…”

She glances away before hesitantly asking-

“About Max’s family...did they...ever hit him?”

For a moment she doesn’t care about the expression that comes across her face, tightening her grip on herself, trying to fight back tears.

She always gets so upset thinking about them, but she has to know…

Sam shook his head “Not quite, Max didn’t like talking about them and I only went to his house once as a kid, but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t still hurt, they...they were never there for him, physically or emotionally, even his siblings, they weren’t like you kids, most of his family are criminals of some kind, I remember once he went home with a broken arm and next day didn’t even have a cast or sling, he told me his siblings thought it was  _ funny  _ and his parents weren’t home at the time…”

He shook his head, still shuddering at the memory “I remember, just after our first case, Max told me he was...afraid of being like them, he felt his family were like them and it’s lead to a lot of...self-loathing issues.”

Cami frowns, hesitating before-

“...Our parents weren’t so great either...they used to make me do jobs that...I don’t even remember what they used to make me do but I know it was horrible and I wouldn’t see my sibs for days at a time, and if we ever did something they didn’t like they’d…”

She shuddered, biting her tongue to prevent bursting into sobs.

Sam gave a sympathetic frown, turning off the stove momentarily to wrap both of his large arms around the young Chimera, hugging her gently in comfort “I’m sorry…”

He gently looked her in the eyes “I promise you kiddo, as long as I live, you won’t have to go through that ever again.”

Cami hesitates before clinging to Sam, her ears pressing against her head.

She takes a moment before-

“...They almost killed us one night. They had us get in their car in the middle of the night and it didn’t take me long to realize something was wrong, but by then it was too late...they...had drove straight to the Hudson and jumped out…”

She chokes on a sob, shaking.

Sam froze, a mixture of abject horror and anger settled into him but held back from growling for Cami’s sake, making a mental note to put these so called parents on the top of his and Max’s kill-on-sight list.

He remained quiet, letting Cami let it all out.

“We probably had a minute of an air pocket in the car, the water was filling in so fast and I was desperately trying to get us out, they...they were so scared, Yakko didn’t know how to swim and he was terrified about drowning, we all were, but I had to make sure to tell them to calm down, that we were getting out, to just make sure to breathe. I eventually got to the point where I was kicking one of the windows, and the car had fully filled up when I managed to break it, taking my sibs and escaping the car and reaching the surface.”

Cami takes in a shuddering breath, letting out a sob.

“After that we never returned back to our old house...eventually we were found by the orphanage…”

She doesn’t mention the 10 second scare of Yakko not responding before coughing up water.

She doesn’t mention having to remove glass from her feet from breaking the window and tearing her own shirt to make make-shift bandages.

She doesn’t mention how this made her fear being watched by their parents who might come to finish the job.

She doesn’t mention how she’s STILL scared of it happening again.

She can’t...can’t let it happen again…

They were lucky that time...what if the next time they weren’t so lucky?

Sam held onto Cami, placing a comforting hand on her head “Hey, hey, it’s alright, that will NEVER happen again, I promise you, me and Max, we won’t  _ let it happen again. _ ”

He meant what he said, he’d make sure of it “And I’m  _ never _ letting those people anywhere near you kids, ever again.”

“...Promise?” Cami asks, looking up to the Irish Greyhound, her tears still running down heavily, trembling.

Sam looked directly in her eyes, dead serious “Cross my heart and hope to die, sweetheart. Me and Max’ll give ‘em what for if those sorry excuses for parental figures if they even try contacting you kids. I promise.”

He meant it with every fiber of his damn being, he was usually one for talking before resorting to ruthless violence, shoot first and ask questions probably never was Max’s forte, but in the case of these so called ‘parents’ well, it was an exception.

Cami glances at him before breaking into more sobs, tightening her grip on him, burying her face into his chest.

“...Th-thank you...Dad…”

Sam looked surprised before a warm smile appeared on his face, gently ruffling up her poofy raven black hair “Anytime, sweetheart.”

They stayed like that for a while before turning back to the stove “Now, what do you say we finish up these burgers before they get back, last time lunch wasn’t ready after Max got back from being away from the office, he almost ate all our plates!”

Cami giggles, wiping her tears, nodding.

“Yeah! Yeah, let's finish these burgers!” 

As Sam started to stove up again, getting the burgers ready, he gave a small glance to Cami, a smile curved up his muzzle, happy to see her a bit happier than she was before.

Turning back to the burgers, he put the first cooked burger onto a plate.

Cami smiles at Sam again, her tail wagging.

Maybe it’s okay to let herself hope...to get comfortable to this new life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rest assured, this isn’t the end, this is only the first part in a series of stories about this chaotic little family.


End file.
